Sweet Jesus

So, here I am, multiple months since my last 'blog'. Why for the absence - I don't know. Certainly not because I have an overly exciting and/or entertaining life - though the three year old is always good for the unexpected and brings a lot of fun to the house. Or has it been indifference - no, I don't think that's it...I've been accused of a lot of things, but, indifference isn't one of them.

Time it seems to me is a real dichotomy. On the one hand life is so fragile - it can be taken away in the in blink of an eye or simply slip away like sand through my fingers. And then on the other hand time keeps marching on, no matter what - calling a little 'time out' every now and then would be nice, just to catch your breath or regroup - but no, time just keeps on keeping on. Again, having a three year old in the house makes that crystal clear to me, when time is measured by how many "sleeps" it is until something will happen - usually something good and exciting.

I don't know, time it seems to me is a little overrated. Whoever said 'time heals all' didn't have a clue what they were talking about - the hole in my heart that belongs to my husband is no smaller today than the day he died - and the void in my life that Mom filled is no less either. There just really isn't "healing" for some things.

I would think that as I get more "mature" that "things" wouldn't bother me as much that losses wouldn't feel so great - but again, a wrong assumption. So, I just say to myself "Sweet Jesus" and keep on keeping on.,...because time doesn't stand still - never.